From confession to commitment – engagement to burnout and back again.
Engagement is the diamond in the heart of work and wellbeing.
This post is personal. Work is personal. This is not a vague theoretical outline of disengagement. It is also not a quick fix. This post outlines a challenging journey from disengagement to re-engagement. Although it is personal, I believe embedded in the experience are insights and approaches that have universal application.
Overall, my work had been steadily progressing in employee engagement for over a decade but on November 3rd of 2016 I hit a work-related speed bump. It threw the meaning of my work up in the air, jolted me emotionally, and almost brought me to a complete stop.
On November 3rd I was teaching my employee engagement course in Dubai when between 10AM and 3PM, three of the fully engaged participants suffered major economic and career setbacks that were out of their control. Engagement is no guarantee against the consequences of major economic upheaval. That same evening my wife phoned to let me know that she had been let go from the leadership position she loved. Susan had the highest level of work engagement I know but this was no guarantee of work, organizational appreciation, or career security. These two events on opposite sides of the globe hit me much harder than I first realized. I don’t believe burnout occurs in one day but November 3rd crystallized many other experiences, perceptions, and emotions over the previous year or two into my personal D-Day or Disengagement-Day.
Since that time I have been showing classic signs of burnout: exhaustion, cynicism, and the belief that my work was not making a difference. I felt that my work on engagement was equivalent to putting lipstick on camels. It isn’t very pretty and the camel is still a camel!
For the past decade, I had focused all my work on employee engagement from founding and hosting the 7400 member Employee Engagement Network to education and speeches around the world, and writing four books on work. Imagine my befuddlement as I found myself disengaged from my own work. I felt even worse because I had comprehensive knowledge and methods to engage yet I was stuck. I believe work can make us well but I was not well at this time. In addition, I have a 30-year background as an employee assistance counselor and university counselor educator. I was naively arrogant believing this knowledge and expertise would make me immune from disengagement.
My sense of being engaged in meaningful work was blurred and my vigor, dedication, and absorption to both initiate and complete tasks were depleted. I did most of my work but not at the level I expected of myself, and a number of tasks languished on the proverbial back burner.
At 62, I contemplated retiring from work yet I know in my heart that there was much I still feel called to do and I am stubborn enough not to give up.
A month ago, I encountered and fully resonated with a new word: “inanition.” Inanition means being empty, lacking in enthusiasm, vitality, and vigor. It is a spiritual emptiness, loss of purpose, and exhaustion caused by a lack of nourishment. My work failed to nourish me — my energy was dwindling, and I was a living example of inanition.
My experience is personal but it also seems to have a sense of universality to it. Your causes of disengagement, burnout or inanition may be quite different than mine, ranging from job loss and unfair practices at work to a lack of psychological safety or major career setback, but the pathway out of inanition to full engagement may have commonalities.
Here are 12 points of navigational guidance if you should encounter burnout or inanition during your career journey:
- Know that your career is a hero’s journey. In every hero’s journey there will be dragons (challenges and setbacks) and that’s what makes the journey so engaging, challenging, and rewarding. Of course you might also get scorched.
- Be patient, kind and accepting. The road back to engagement may be longer than you think. It may ask you not to be so tough on yourself. It may demand acceptance without giving up or sinking into despondent acquiescence or depression.
- Being resilient doesn’t mean you are a rubber ball that can instantly bounce back after being thrown to the ground. Infuse gentle tenacity and personal stubbornness based on your career purpose or calling into your human and fallible resilience. Embrace human resilience and authentic unfolding during your career quest.
- Acknowledge that setbacks are inevitable and they do not signal the end of the journey.
- When you are on fire because of burnout it is time to stop, drop, and roll. Determine what you may need to stop doing and what you may need to drop from your work and expectations. Once you have determined what you need to stop don’t freeze — determine how you will roll into re-engagement and healthy wellbeing.
- Take personal responsibility for your own engagement without sinking into self-blame or guilt when things are not moving as fast as you hope or think they should.
- Embrace impermanence. Nothing lasts. Know that change can, and will, occur. As one Zen statement declares: spring comes and the grass grows by itself. Authentic optimists know that setbacks are seldom permanent, pervasive, and personal.
- Let others know what you are going through and ask for help. Depending upon the severity, duration and intensity of the experience consult with a career coach or employee assistance counselor. Every hero needs a mentor or Yoda.
- Know that meaning at work and in life is not something we find, it is something we create and at times need to re-create. I will no longer put lipstick on camels but I can offer many contributions to make work better for individuals and organizations.
- Overall in overcoming inanition, look more for trending than transformation. I wanted to wake up the next morning and have it all be gone and for me to be my old self but I now focus more on positive trending in a more engaged direction than magic cures or effortless engagement elixirs.
- There are always lessons embedded in every experience. Inanition may not be the most welcome of work teachers but the lessons learned may be invaluable for the rest of your career. I am still very much in the process of determining what I have learned and how that learning will shape the remainder of my career.
- Embrace life and work. Work is not a problem to be solved; it is an experience to be lived. Don’t miss it because you imagine or believe it should be something other than it is in the present moment.
Pregnancy and Rebirth. I trace back my challenges with burnout and engagement to November 3, 2016. Today is August 3, 2017. If November 3rd was D-Day than I consider August 3rd E-Day, the day of full re-engagement. This time frame of nine months seems very symbolic to me. I have gone through a very challenging pregnant pause in my work on engagement but it has given birth to a rebirth in engagement and burnout made stronger by the challenges and setbacks. I would be delighted to work with you and your organization to help you give rebirth to engagement while also preventing or alleviating burnout by focusing on everyday employee engagement.
I often offer a line in the conclusion of my writing and after writing this post, I know that this is as much a message to myself as to my readers: Engage along with me, the best is yet to be.
David Zinger is a human and fallible expert on employee engagement and believes that work can make us well, even if sometimes it doesn’t. He designed and delivers a powerful daily behavioural approach to preventing and overcoming burnout and installing authentic and powerful engagement. This education is offered in keynotes, workshops, courses, and masterclasses. David believes in the power of everyday employee engagement to make work better and to make us better.
Hi David,
This really resonated with me, as I had a similar experience last summer, where I felt completely burnt out and like I was done with engagement. This bit especially resonated with me: “Know that meaning at work and in life is not something we find, it is something we create and at times need to re-create.”
Thank you for posting this. I always forget that chances are, whatever I’m experiencing, someone else is too, and reaching out and talking about it helps get me through.
Jasmine
Jasmine: If not one other person was to read this post I would feel that the last 9 months and the effort and honesty to write this post was all worth it because of your comment. Thank you so much for taking the time to respond, as you can tell by my response, it means a lot to me.
You need to be vulnerable to share such a humbling life experience as you have with the world, David.
Thanks for putting your heart and soul into this post and for providing some “navigational guidance”.
When my business failed and my life imploded in 2002 one of my daughters sent me a quote which said, “How many times do we thank God for the doors that are closed?” Once I got my head around that I began to see the lessons I needed to learn. We all have to learn the same lessons – we just have different classes to experience in life. I think you have graduated from this particular class with flying colours!!
Thank you, David. “Know that meaning at work and in life is not something we find, it is something we create and at times need to re-create.” Sometimes we expect life to bless us with meaning and sit around waiting for it to happen, disappointed and unhappy. I like the push for us all to take some responsibility in this. It’s also good to remember that sometimes we just need to turn around and move our eyes away from what we THOUGHT could make us happy and fulfilled to see what really can!
Roy: That means a lot coming from you. Yes sometimes the door must close rather than injuring our foot by jamming in the door to keep it open. Thanks for the “graduation with flying colours”.
Marge: You comment was meaningful to me. I love the expression “sometimes we expect life to bless us with meaning and sit around waiting for it to happen…” Thank you for taking the time to comment. David
Thank you for sharing your personal journey. Knowing that dis-engagement or “inanition” is real and can happen to the most engaged just made me realize that what I am experiencing now can be turned around and could take time. Your guidance will help people and I appreciate all your work and the network you have created.
Aside from pragmatics of making a living, I have never encountered a single example where engagement drivers were not ultimately self-less. Doubt, while never pleasant, certainly functions as a fulcrum to better assess unconditional giving in the context of self. While I often grapple with the imperfect dichotomy of selfishness and selflessness, I believe only kind intent matters. Certainly, humans require love and affirmation. Without it, well, there’s ample evidence of the ill effects. And affirmation, I believe, is a potent tonic to quell the heartburn of inanition. Your support in my journey is a perfect example. Thank you again, David. Caring acts count and should dispel any doubt. Just a personal note of support and affirmation to you, Vince
Laurie-Anne, thank you for taking the time to comment and time with caring intention for self and others can make a big difference. Sometimes it seems so damn tough to care and at times we may need to care less but we have to watch for chronic carelessness. Take care, and carry on caring, David
Vince, I know you as a People Artist, you have such a way with words and the meaning behind those words. What stood out for me was “kind intent matters” and “a potent tonic to quell the heartburn of inanition.”
WOW David, after receiving today’s Zinger I was wondering what had happened to all the others I was used ti receive. Now I understand. I heart-fully thank you for sharing your D-Day to E-Day journey.
I realize that not only I missed you, I really needed your Zinger today. In particular today.
Gracias!!
Alejandro: I am glad “my Zinger” came at the right time. All the best with all of your work and thank you for taking time to respond. David
I think that many of us resonate with all or parts of this over time. Your 12 points are solid ideas that we should all keep in mind and work through as needed or necessary. I’ve been working pretty much alone for the past 33 years, with a supportive business partner but no one here side by side for a long time. And some days are much rougher than others. I will admit that I sensed some tensions in our private conversations, and I will still remain convinced that you and i should collaborate on things for a bigger and broader impact.
At 69, a main goal is to leave a legacy and an impact, and that is what keeps pushing me forward. The disappointments when “colleagues” fail to meet their promises and commitments is hard to deal with, but simply reality. What helps push me forward is my focus on the vision, I guess. The world is frustrating and humbling, for sure. And I am basically quite stubborn and persistent when I want to be. Having a sense of commitment to having an impact is what sustains me, probably.
We live in a tough place at a tough time. And it is hard for me to “wax eloquent” with the personal stuff.
And it is even harder to keep operating when one has a broader perspective on things, something that I feel we share.
So, hang in there and keep up the good works. Those should be somewhat sustaining. And reach out when you need to.
Scott, thank you for your very thoughtful and considerate remarks. Much appreciated and helps to round out the traces of my own personal square wheels.
Thanks, David, for your candor, your insights and your wisdom. I know this post, as all of what you write, will be helpful to many who are struggling with similar issues. Well done.
Hi Judy: Thank you for your comments and I trust it will be helpful. P.S. I like your new website design, well done. David
David thank you for this heartfelt piece on your experience. Burnout is downright scary; mine happened a long time ago when working for a big, high pressure consulting firm and resulted in downright misery at work and temporary memory loss. It ended when I quit, took 6 months off to spend time in far off, peaceful places to decompress, then came back and became my own boss.
I think those of us in this business owe it to clients to take good care of ourselves, examine carefully our definitions of “success”, learn to enjoy life every moment, and find balance in everything. After all, few things are more ironic than a burned-out morale/engagement consultant! So welcome back, and may the many blessings…the silver linings…of this experience flow into your work going forward.
David: I so much appreciate you taking some time to write this response and I appreciate the irony. I will ensure it flows into my work going forward. David
Thank you for sharing your story David. Great insight and your 12 points are excellent. I agree, “the best is yet to be”!
Thank you Lara: Always good to hear from you. Have an excellent September. David